do you ever lie in bed for hours? You know, in that phase between awake and asleep? And there's so much on your mind it feels like your brain might just explode and electrocute itself like foil in a microwave?
My advice, write. Get all those thoughts out. So that there's some space in your brain for all Those wonderful dreams of yours. Well...my dreams have been taking on a zombie theme as of late...but that's a whole other blog all together.
Sometimes I write to my dead aunt. Or my estranged father. Usually it's not even about them, it's about random thoughts I have. But the good thing? I know they'll never read it.
But then there's the times I write letters to people that I do talk to. Or some that are in my past, but that one day I might talk to again. These are usually the ones I end up tossing in the trash. I'm always afraid one day I'll get the guts to put them in the mail.
So I laid in bed tonight for four hours. Yes. You read that right. I laid here for 240 minutes with only a few thoughts running through my head.
I'm not going to post who or what those were about. (hey, I gotta keep some things private after all!) But I did end up writing a little something.
I closed my eyes and imagined I was writing and all my thoughts were out of my mind
The words were stepping stones to a pond I could unleash my thoughts into.
One by one I watched them as they swam away; some went under deep rocks, others lingered on the surface, and some came to shore and laid down beside me.
And I laid back to look into a sky of rhymes. Where blues and whites were no Longer space and fluff, but irony and whimsy.
I saw things that made me laugh, things that made me cry.
I felt my hands tremble with anger an my eyes widen with despair.
My thoughts began to wind around me me. Suffocating, loosening, embracing.
Oh, the sweet embrace.
All of the words come together into a beautiful story. They flowed from one page to the other, and I find myself on the edge of my seat, wishing that this story would last forever...
But they never do, do they? My beautiful pond will dry up...my clouds will loose their luster as they conform to the sky...my bed of grass will soon become twisted and pale with the burning sun...
But here I lay, with my thoughts around me. Staring into a forever which must come to an end.
I'm reassured by drops of a rain.
A sigh. A stretch. Eyes closing...
And here I fall asleep. Wrapped up in the warm thoughts I still keep hidden from night thinking...below a cleansing storm.
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